


For the First Time

by delightfulship



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: M/M, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-11
Updated: 2013-07-11
Packaged: 2017-12-19 03:21:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,667
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/878825
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/delightfulship/pseuds/delightfulship
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry and Louis go their separate ways but end up crossing paths. i guess you could call it fate.</p>
            </blockquote>





	For the First Time

**Author's Note:**

> this story is going to be based off of [this](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VwA3DWdUfNk) song. if you want to listen to it while reading then feel free! 
> 
> i hope you enjoy the story. :)

Being in love can be one of the best feelings in the world or that is what some people say. You feel exactly like they do in all the movies. You think _“Wow this could be the one”_ and all of a sudden you feel this burst of happiness and all you can feel is your heart race and butterflies explode in your stomach. In your mind you picture him as Noah and you picture yourself as Allie from the notebook. You never thought you would find yourself falling in love in the first place because you never simply believed in it. But, then you met that one person who changed your mind completely and you couldn’t help but simply fall. You have this unbreakable bond with your significant other and you don’t think anything can really go wrong. You feel like you’re on cloud nine and your relationship can’t go anywhere but up. Well I am here to tell you that it’s complete and utter bullshit and things can in fact go wrong because here I am at the bar trying to drink my problems away.

“Shot of jack.” I said towards the bartender and he nodded.

I mean sure you’re going to have little arguments now and then because that is natural in a relationship. You would have never thought that one of those arguments would lead to a break up. That one little silly stupid argument caused you to lose the one person who made you believe in love in the first place. Of course you were the one who started the argument because it’s usually always you who starts the damn thing. 

The shot was soon placed in front of me and I downed it right away. As I set this glass down all I could do was allow myself to fall back into the flashback.

_  
“You what?!” Louis yelled._

_“I lost my job.” I deadpanned._

_“How can you act like this is nothing? This is everything Harry! That was our source of income! What are we going to do?!” He yelled once more which caused my anger to rise._

_“I don’t know what the fuck we’re going to do Louis?! Now can you please shut the fuck up and stop yelling? I have had the most shit day and I don’t need you yelling at my face saying that we’re fucked because I kind of already realize that.” I snapped._

_“Well maybe if you didn’t go to work late so many times.” Louis mumbled and I glared at him._

_“Well maybe if you got off your lazy arse and tried to get a job we wouldn’t be in the situation. All you do is sit on your ass and play house wife.” I said irritated._

_“I don’t want to work Harry. I hardly get to see you enough as it is. You also know I am trying to finish school so I can actually get myself a better job then you actually have. So we can actually pay all of our bills on time and not have our power or water shut off because we’re late.” Louis snapped back._

_“I work more hours then I even planned on working. I even try to pick up extra shifts because I know we lack money and you going to school doesn’t help the whole situation. You are going to be shitting out your student loans for so long that’s all your money will be going to and fuck that’s even what some of our money right now is going to. I am paying for your books and your classes. I work so damn hard so don’t try to pull this shit with me. If I am not enough for you then, why the fuck are you even with me Louis?” I found my voice rising higher and higher after each sentence._

_“Get out.” Louis said as his bottom lip trembled and tears were forming in his eyes._

_“What?” I asked sounding like the wind got knocked out of me._

_“I said get out!” Louis yelled. “I am done Harry.”_

_I now felt my heart drop to my stomach. “W-What do you mean done?”_

_“Exactly what it sounds like, now get out of my apartment Harry and never come back.” Louis said as his voice cracked and he pointed towards the door._

_I left and ended up leaving my heart right behind.  
_

“Another shot.” I said and the bartender nodded once again.

I always let my anger get out of control and I knew this time that I let it get way out of control. I didn’t blame Louis for kicking me out and breaking up with me. But, I didn’t know what heartbreak felt like before this very moment. I kind of thought it was like drowning. You can see the sunlight caress the top of the water but you soon find yourself falling down and down into the abide of darkness. That’s where you continue to sink and sink until you can finally learn how to swim again. I didn’t think I was ever going to learn how to swim again as in this case fall in love. I did have other relationships before Louis but they were never as serious as ours. They were just little flings and would probably only end up lasting a few weeks if they were even that lucky. When I met Louis I got this feeling that I had never felt before and I couldn’t find myself to just walk out and leave. I found myself starting to spend more and more time with him and eventually we ended up moving in together and becoming a couple. We had been together for 9 months and I know that might not be long enough to say that I was in love with him but, I was. 

I found myself downing shot after shot until the bartender told me that I had enough. But when the alcohol started burning the back of my throat it let out a release or that I was just too drunk to even care. I would go with both of those options. Even though I couldn’t drink anymore I remained at the bar because I didn’t really have anywhere else I could go anyways. I just got done paying all the bills so I was flat broke and I wasn’t allowed to go back to our – Louis’ apartment. I ended up staying at the bar until closing time and by then it was already 1 am and as I stood outside the bar, under a street light, I knew I only had one person to call.

“Do you have any idea what time it is Harry?” Anne asked.

“Mum.” I choked out.

“Oh baby,” it’s like she read my mind. “I will buy you the first train ticket home. Do you have anywhere else you can stay?”

“No. Have no money.” I whimpered.

“I will transfer some money into your bank account for one night at a hotel. Then I will buy you your train ticket in the morning.” She said.

“Thanks. I love you, mum.” I whispered.

“I love you too, sweetheart. Everything is going to be okay and I promise that. Now find the nearest hotel and get some rest. I will text you in the morning and give you your time for your train.” She replied.

“Okay. Goodbye.” I said and hung up before she could say anything.

I walked down the dark sidewalk only to be lighted by the street lights above me. It was starting to turn into winter so I could see my breath as it parted through my lips. I hugged myself and rubbed my arms to stay warm until I could find a hotel nearby. I know I could have called somebody else besides my mum but they were all sleeping and I’m sure they would have killed me if I woke them up. Besides they weren’t the greatest friends in the world and I kind of stopped hanging out with them having to work all the time and being with Louis. As I was walking I stared up at the sky and stared at the stars in the London sky. It was clear enough to see every single star tonight and I was kind of hoping that Louis was doing the same. The name was now bitter and sadness when it left my lips but in my mind it was the only thing I could say. 

I soon found a hotel 20 minutes later and when I walked in I was welcomed by a gust of warm air which stung my now pink cheeks a little. 

“Hello sir, how many nights?” The receptionist asked.

“Just one for tonight please.” I asked handing over my credit card.

“Name under that?” She asked while typing away on her computer.

“Harry Styles” I said and she passed over my key.

“4th floor and room 37, I hope you have a wonderful stay Mr. Styles.” She smiled and I nodded.

I made my way over to the elevator and pressed the button which would now lead me to my Louis-less room. I could feel tears start to brim my eyes and I quickly wiped them away. The elevator doors soon opened and I made my way inside and pressing the number four button. It soon started to make its way up and the only sound around was the constant ding reaching each floor. When the doors opened I made my way down the hallway staring at each door until I got to mine. I put the key in the lock and opened up the door. The room was dark and I immediately made my way over to the bed not bothering to turn on a light. I kicked off my shoes and crawled into the cold bed. I pulled out my phone from my pocket and scrolled through the pictures in the gallery on it. I knew it was a bad idea since I knew the pictures were going to consist of Louis and I. There was a picture of Louis on my back and I was holding him up. His friend Niall was the one who took the picture and he was a good lad. I wondered if he was the one who was comforting Louis while I was being comforted by a cold hotel bed.

“I love you, Louis.” I whispered to the picture.

I locked my phone and set it on the nightstand beside the bed. I soon let the darkness consume me and knock me into a dreamless sleep. 

-

I woke up to light peeking through the curtains and I frowned knowing instantly where I was. There was a little bit of me hoping that last night was just a horrible vivid dream and I was disappointed when it wasn’t. I grabbed my phone and saw I had one text message. I was hoping and praying that it was Louis but it just ended up being my mum telling me when my train was leaving. I glanced at my clock and it was and it was already 11 am and my train was leaving at 1. I decided to take a shower since I probably reeked of alcohol and to my luck I didn’t have that much of a hangover at all. I got out of bed and walked over to the bathroom and shutting the door behind me. I turned on the water and made sure it was warm before I started stripping out of my clothes. I sighed when I realized that was the only set of clothes I had so no matter how long I took a shower my clothes were still going to reek of alcohol. 

I stepped into the warm water and let it run over every inch of my body. I grabbed the hotel shampoo bottle, poured some into my hand and ran it through my hair. I rinsed it out and then ran the soap over my body. I smirked when I got to my shoulder and I could see the scratch marks go from my back to the tip of my shoulder. Louis and I had sex the day before yesterday and it was amazing just like every other time. The sex isn’t even going to be something that I miss most. I am going to miss the little things that made me smile every single day. How Louis would walk around in his underwear and in one of my shirts while I made breakfast, when we would end up buying and drinking cheap wine and just talk about random shit, how he would wrap his arms around my waist, go on his tippy toes and rest his chin on my shoulder. I am going to miss his kisses most and his laugh. I caught myself smiling thinking about all the memories between Louis and I. I might not be with Louis anymore but at least I had the memories and that was something he could never take away from me. 

I turned off the water, got out of the shower and wrapped a towel around my waist. I grabbed my clothes, walked out of the bathroom and threw them on the bed. I took off the towel and slipped on my underwear. I ran the towel through my hair so it wouldn’t be soaking wet and would end up only being damp. I glanced at the clock and it was already almost 12. I slipped on my shoes, grabbed the key and out of the room and made my way to the elevator. I pressed the button and as it opened there was a girl on the other side who smiled at me as she walked passed. I returned one back and walked into the elevator and pressing the lobby button. 

I made my way to the front desk and returned the key.

“I hope you enjoyed your stay.” The receptionist smiled at me.

“Yeah.” I mumbled and walked away. 

I walked outside and flagged down a cab. When one finally pulled up I got inside. 

“The train station please.” I said and the guy nodded at the rear view mirror.

I stared at the scenery as we made our way to the train station. Each one I looked at seemed like it held a memory of Louis and I. I remember when we went out and we went and saw all the typical landmarks tourist would go and see while they were in London. We took cheesy pictures in front of all of them and I am pretty sure that was one of the days I loved most. Another one of my favorite memories was when Louis tried to make me a cake for my birthday and the mix ended up flying everywhere in the kitchen because he turned the mixer up to high. Instead of cleaning up we ended up having sex on the kitchen table and licking the cake mix off of each other. Even though it also hurt to think about all these memories I knew I thrived to live off of them because it was all I had left. 

“And here we are at the train station.” The cab driver said.

I got out and handed him the money and walked to the booth to get my train ticket.

“A ticket to Cheshire please.” I said while handing the lady my credit card and she nodded.

“Here you go sir. Have a lovely trip.” She said.

“Thanks.” I said and walked away.

It was 12:55 so I had 5 minutes until my train was going to arrive. Most of me wished that Louis was going to burst through the doors, run up to me, jump in my arms and kiss me. I knew this wasn’t some movie so it wasn’t going to happen. But I could still wish, right? I sat down on a bench in front of the tracks waiting for the train to arrive. I knew when I got home that my mum was just going to make me talk about it but maybe that is part of the healing process. I know that running away from your problems isn’t the best thing to do but right now it was my only option. Louis told me to never come back so that’s what I was exactly going to do. My train finally came and I boarded onto it while handing them my ticket. I sat on a seat next to the window so I could stare out it the entire time hoping to make the train ride a lot faster. 

-

We finally arrived in Cheshire and as I got off I embraced my mum in the biggest hug that I have probably ever given her. 

“Hi mum.” I mumbled into his shoulder.

“Hello sweetheart.” She mumbled back into me. 

We stood there hugging for a few minutes before she pulled away.

“Let’s get going, shall we? Gemma is actually home from uni for awhile and I am sure she would love to see you and vise versa.” Anne said while smiling at her son.

“Yeah, I have missed Gems.” I smiled back at my mum and we made our way to the car.

“Are you going to tell me what happened?” She asked as she pulled out of the train station.

“We fought…but this time it was different. He told me to get out and never come back mum.” I choked.

“I am sure he didn’t mean it honey. I am sure in a few days you will be talking again and things will be as good as new.” She said gripping my knee and I sent her a small smile.

“Yeah, maybe.” I said while leaning my head against the window.

And if you told me after today I was never going to speak to Louis Tomlinson again. I wouldn’t have believed you.

**3 years later**

“Harry!” Anne yelled.

“Yes mum?” I asked coming into the kitchen.

“We’re out of milk. Do you think you could run to the store?” She asked and I nodded.

“Of course.” I said and made my way out the door.

We were staying in London because Gemma was getting married in a few days. We were staying her Fiancé’s and her flat since she insisted so we didn’t have to pay for a hotel. It was a little cramped but it was nothing we couldn’t handle. I got into Gemma’s car and made my way towards the nearest grocery store. I turned on the radio and The Fray started to blast through the speakers. I kept it on the station and I started to sing along to the song. 

“Don’t let me go, don’t let me go, don’t let me go.” I sang. 

But eventually the song ended and I soon found myself parked in the parking lot of the grocery store. I walked inside and made my way through the aisles trying to find the milk and I ended up bumping into somebody’s cart by accident.

“I’m sorry.” I said.

“H-Harry?” the person said and when I looked up I couldn’t believe who it was.

“Louis?” I asked as my eyes went wide.

“Um, Hi.” He said as his cheeks turned a light pink color.

“Erm – Hi.” I said placing my hand on the back of my neck.

“How are you?” he asked.

“I am doing alright. Just here visiting, Gemma is actually getting married so yeah. How are you?” I said awkwardly.

“Wow, really? Well good for her. I am doing alright myself.” Louis said while gripping onto the shopping cart.

“That’s good. It was um – it was nice seeing you again I suppose.” I said.

“It was nice seeing you again too.” Louis said.

I began walking away but I was stopped by a voice.

“I miss you, you know?” Louis said and I turned around looking at him. 

“I didn’t mean what I said that night and here I am 3 years later apologizing to you in a grocery store. I know I could have called or texted you but I didn’t blame you for not wanting me back. I’m really sorry Hazza.” Louis said and I felt myself choke up as he used my old nickname.

“I always wanted you back Lou. I was waiting for you to call or text me but it never came and I didn’t blame you. I said things I should have never said I am sorry for that. After the fight I went to a bar and drowned my sorrows in Jack Daniel’s. I knew I had nowhere else to go so I had to call my mum at one in the morning and she loaned me money to stay at a hotel and then she bought me a train ticket back to Cheshire. Months in advance all my mind could revolve around was you. I realized that I had lost you for good and I was never going to forgive myself. Hell, I still haven’t to this day. When my mum said we had to go to London for Gemma’s wedding I was okay with it because what were the odds of me running into you? Very slim I thought but I guess I was wrong. But here I am pouring my heart to you in the middle of a grocery store. I still haven’t gotten over you and I don’t think I ever will and it sucks.” I said as my bottom lip started to tremble and Louis already had tears in his eyes. 

He walked up to me and placed his hands on the back of my neck. “I am so sorry, so sorry Harry. I didn’t mean to ever hurt you like that. People don’t hurt the people they love and that’s exactly what I did. That night I called Niall and I told him that I had fucked up big time and I cried into his chest and he told me that you would come around eventually but you never did. For the past 3 years you took over my thoughts every once in awhile. I always wondered what you were doing and if you had found somebody new. I always tried to call you but I was just so scared and I thought you would have moved on by now. I still love you so much and I know I am always going to.” Louis said as he pulled me into a hug and I wrapped my arms around him.

“I still love you too, Lou. I love you too.” I said as I buried my face into his neck.

“Do you um – do you wanna go back to my place?” Louis asked as he pulled away and I smiled.

“I’d love that.” I said smiling at him and we walked out of the grocery store.

“I took Gems car so I will just follow you, same place?” I asked and Louis nodded.

We went our separate ways to our cars but this time I knew that us splitting up was only going to be temporary. I followed behind Louis back to our old apartment that was now just his and I was a little eager to get back. I parked behind his car and got out. The apartment complex still looked the exact same it did 3 years old besides some of the paint peeling off. We walked up the stairs and Louis unlocked the door and opened it. I felt a sudden impact of memories hit me and the place hadn’t really changed besides a few little things.

“Sorry it’s a little messy. After everything that happened Niall ended up moving in with me since I started to feel a little lonely.” Louis said shyly.

“It still kind of looks the same really besides a few little things.” I said smiling a bit.

“I would offer you some coffee but since you know I’m not a big coffee drinker and neither is Niall so we just got rid of it. Would you like some wine instead?” He asked and I nodded.

“I would love some.” I said whole following Louis into the kitchen.

“Is that um – is that the wine I bought us 3 years ago?” I asked as Louis pulled the wine out of the cabinet.

“Yeah, I guess it is. Ha. Never really wanted to get rid of it and I wanted to use it for a special occasion.” Louis said as he got glasses out of the cabinet.

He poured the wine into the glasses, handing one to me and I took a drink.

“Still as cheap as ever.” I chuckled

Then Louis took a drink. “Indeed it is. But for some reason I always enjoyed it anyways.” 

“So what have you done over the years?” I asked. “Catch me up.”

“Well I ended up finishing school so I am now a drama school teacher and it’s pretty wonderful actually. I enjoy working around the kids.” Louis said and I nodded. “What about you?” He asked.

“Working back at the old bakery and I went to school for a few years for music. But besides that I haven’t really been up to much.” I said taking another drink of my wine. 

“No significant other. Mhmm?” Louis asked while raising an eyebrow and I chuckled.

“Did you not hear my speech at the grocery store?” 

“So you went 3 years without sex? I am impressed Styles.” Louis said while grinning and taking a drink of his wine. 

“Well no not exactly. I had a few flings here and there but they were nothing compared to you.” I said and Louis’ cheeks turned a light pink.

“Same goes for me. I guess I couldn’t really ever get over you, it’s those curly locks I tell you.” Louis said and I smiled.

“For me, it’s your bum.” I said and Louis laughed. God how I missed that laugh.

My phone started to vibrate and mum flashed on the screen and I answered.

“Hey mum.” I said.

“Where are you Harry? It can’t be that hard to pick up milk.” She said.

“Shit.” I whispered.

“Harry Edward Styles, what did you just say to your mother?” Anne asked.

“Nothing sorry I just ran into an old friend. I will be home soon. I promise.” I said and ended the call.

“Sorry I kind of forgot I was on a quest for milk until I ran into you.” I said finishing my wine and getting up from the chair.

“It’s okay. We both kind of ditched our whole purpose of going to the store.” Louis said and I smirked.

“Yeah, I guess so.” I said and I headed towards the door. 

“We um – we really need to hang out again sometime. Sometime soon that is. I really did miss you Harry.” Louis said standing against the door frame.

“I really missed you too Louis. I promise we will hang out soon. I am actually in London for the next week so how about we get together? Here give me your phone and I will program my number.” I said reaching out.

“Who said I still don’t have it?” He said while raising an eyebrow.

“Do you?” I asked.

“No.” He chuckled and I rolled my eyes, grabbed his phone and programmed my number.

“I’ll see you soon Lou.” I said and started to walk away.

“Harry, wait.” I said and I turned around to find Louis’ lips placed on mine. 

“Sorry. I just really had to do that and I really missed kissing you.” Louis said as he pulled away and I smiled.

“I really missed kissing you too. I will see you around, right?” I asked and Louis nodded.

“See you around Haz.” He said.

With that Louis closed the door and I know I would be seeing him again shortly and just like that everything felt like the very first time.


End file.
